HEY YOU! Part 2

Alright, now it’s time for Part 2 of the HEY YOU! Ramblings.

  • I know that I’m the only one who thinks this, but breast cancer is quickly becoming overexposed. The omnipresence of the colour pink at sporting events this past 12 months has meant that its symbolic importance has been degraded. People recognise that it represents breast cancer- it’s just that they don’t take notice. I think, as heartless as this may sound, that maybe it would be better if we invested some of this money into promoting other cancer foundations. Think of prostate cancer: it’s essentially the male equivalent of breast cancer (even though men can get breast cancer as well), but all I’ve heard about it is some terrible ad telling men to “Get a prick”. Yeah, innuendo is what I first think of when curing cancer as well.
  • Um, did anyone actually know that the Australian Open had started? I had zero idea, and am a little bit upset about this. See, one of the great joys of following sport is derived from theorising about what could happen- who will win, who exceeds expectations, and who has a threesome with the Williams sisters. (Definitely Andre Agassi.) So when you miss that whole preamble, it’s a bit hard to get excited for the actual event. Having said that, my can’t-miss tip of the tournament: if they both make it to the final, Nadal to beat Federer. Actually, speaking of Federer, for a guy who’s arguably the greatest tennis player ever, he’s not really someone you want to aspire to be, is he? He is regularly and inexplicably dominated by another player; his wife is way less attractive than you expect he could pull; his best buddies (Tiger Woods and Thierry Henry) are tarnished forever by their actions in 2009; and he seems to break down and cry whenever he loses. If he’s an ideal role model, then the world just got a little more depressing to me.
  • This year’s Big Day Out is shaping up to be easily the greatest festival of all time. Well maybe I’m hyperbolising, but here’s my schedule, and I’ll fight you if you think it isn’t great:

9:00- Board train. Attempt to avoid bogans with either Australian flags or Southern Cross tattoos. Isn’t it a bit of a waste to bring a flag anyways? Now you’ve got one hand full the whole day, an object that could potentially gouge someone’s eye out, and a constant reminder that you’re just not cool enough to get it inked on you. What do you get in return? Patriotism.

11:00- Exit train somewhere. I’m not too sure where to get off, as I’m geographically illiterate, so hopefully someone else will help me with this step.

11:30- Go to a bar? I’m not sure; I’ve never drunk alcohol before the afternoon, but wouldn’t this be a great day to start? It would also make for a good story at any future AA meetings.

12:15- Bluejuice. Are they any good? I only really know two of their songs. Though it comforts me to know that the song “Broken Leg” is named as such because the frontman broke his leg at a gig, and kept on going (I think). That mix of dedication and pure insanity is always a winner with me.

(OH MY GOD. Courtney Cox was just on television in an advertisement for her new show, and the cleavage! The cleavage! What a Photoshop!)

1:00- Karnivool or Kisschasy? Meh.

2:30- Kasabian- Now we’re getting into the brilliant stuff. The latest album from these guys is spectacular. And I don’t mean in an extravagant, theatrical way; I mean it’s just great music.

3:15- Passion Pit. I wrote about these guys before (crap, I wish I knew how to hyperlink that statement to the blog post), but I’ll say it again: it’s impossible to listen to this music and not dance. Infectious, supersweet electro? This has all the makings of the underrated show of the day.

4:00- Another tough decision. Hilltop Hoods or The Decemberists? I’m leaning towards the latter, mainly because they play the melodica.

5:10- I know, Dizzee and The Horrors are both playing, but The Midnight Juggernauts? I can’t knowingly skip “Into the Galaxy”, I would never be able to forgive myself.

6:25- Screw Lily Allen. Not literally, of course, though if you do, kudos! But I’ve had enough of her, and the way media members fawn when she’s around. She told the Brisbane BDO audience “I’m sorry if you can see my pubes”, and it was described as ‘candid’. Candid? Shouldn’t that mean they reveal something about themselves in a figurative way, not a literal way? Either way, the hirsute Devendra Banhart is thousands of times better.

Also, isn’t it strange that hirsute sounds so similar to hair suit?

7:00- The Mars Volta. This will make or break my day. If they play at least 3 of their songs, I will be ecstatic. But if Omar just says, “Fuck it, I’m soloing” and proceeds to do so for the next hour, then I’m definitely going to cry.

8:00-  Powderfinger, another band I’ve previously written about. I can’t see them being anything other than solid, and that’s really all I’ll want after the mind-numbing Volta set.

9:10- Muse. Hmm. Whilst the latest album is a pile of crap, I am in absolute adoration of songs such as “Knights of Cydonia” and “Plug In Baby”. And really, who else is there to see? Grinspoon? Child, please.

  • Prince William looks ooooolllllddd. He’s thirty? Early thirties? And he already looks like Charles’ younger brother? You know things are bad when people think your redheaded brother is the attractive one.

2 responses to “HEY YOU! Part 2

  1. ha! child, please.
    I’m glad to see Chad Ochocinco’s infuence on your blog

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