The mass media is an unrepentant beast. Y/N?

If you’ve been watching television in the last two months (and I admittedly have not) then you may have seen a particular advertisement for New Weekly, or Woman’s Day, or some other similarly optimistically-feminine titled magazine. It basically consists of a woman bursting into song whilst holding said mag, inciting a mass dance-and-sing-along  amongst the citizens of this bizarre town. Crazily, I can understand these people; if one lunatic started to randomly dance, and then everyone else were unbelievably dancing in time with them, wouldn’t you be so impressed that you just had to join this impromptu party? At the very least, it would be a great story to regale friends with; at the most, it would break the ice with some smoking hot girl afterwards.

The problem (and there’s always a problem) I have with the ad is this: what’s with the guy who does the backflips in the background? In such joyous and coordinated scenes as these, there always seems to be a fool who decides that simple kinetic movements are not enough, throws caution to the wind, and shows everyone up. What does the dude achieve by doing this? That aforementioned smoking hot girl isn’t going to be impressed, that’s for sure. And here’s how it would go with their friends:

BACKFLIPPING TOOL: “Guys, the greatest thing ever happenend today!”

OVERLY OLDE ENGLISH FRIENDS: “Oh do tell, old  chap.”

BT: “I was at the bank, when suddenly, the entire street spontaneously broke out in dance!”

OOEF: “Woahhhhhh! Doth it need not be said that you joined them, old chap.”

BT: “First, stop with the old chap stuff. Really pissing me off. And second, of course I didn’t. I decided to show everyone up, and get their attention, by executing some awesome acrobatics.”

OOEF: “You backflipping tool.”

Maybe you say that you would do backflips in this case. Maybe you say that you’re an individual, a non-conformist, a hyperindie kind of person. The person who won’t listen to an album if someone else knows about it. And to that I say: no one likes that kid.


5 responses to “The mass media is an unrepentant beast. Y/N?

  1. Yeah, I’m not Cameron just to be clear. Surprisingly I agree with Brendan. If people were to spontaneously burst into a amazing (coincidently choreographed) dance you would have to rip off your shirt and join. Backflipping mid-dance is the gayest thing anyone can do. Yes, backflipping it is awesome! Hence why it should only be done as the final move. So after everyone’s already super pumped from dancing… BAM!!! Your mind is blown. Otherwise it’s like reading a book that peaks in the middle and the rest is dribble.

  2. Brucy is just jealous because he knows this is just a thinly veiled criticism of his backflips and other miscellaneous acrobatics. shame on you Brucy, can’t you just be happy for Brendan already?

  3. I’m with Cameron here, I want some.

  4. Are…are you high?

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